Sunday, February 15, 2015

Half Time !

Life is moving on...If I am lucky, I must have

crossed the half line of my life.

What have I gained ? What have I lost ? What have I

done !

It's a very strange mix of feelings when I look back

on all that has happened.

Fuh ! Can't explain...how it feels. Surely it feels

good, feels huge, feels tiny, feels sad, feels

happy....frankly...I dunno what is this feeling..

I think I've lived a life of my choice...have taken

risks, travelled places,

experimented...explored...adventured..

The journey is definately being very worthy...the

emptiness inside keeps growing though...

the feeling that m exhausting myself up with each

passing day brings nervousness, pressure, josh and

excitement all at the same time !

I have this gut feeling that I am at a crucial cross

road...moves that I make ...choices that I

take...will define the end of my story ....!

My understanding has grown....grown so much that I

know now that perhaps I understanding nothing !

Sometimes I wonder...wouldn't it have been better that I chased a dream of becoming a CEO...or a World Traveller...or a Film Maker...

What made me calm down...and walk so silently...

The urge to make noise and shout is still there and it does pop up from time to time ...but somewhere I know...silence is better...non-doing is better...do I really Know !

I wonder if I confuse the reader equally as myself ! I wish I could pour down these feelings and become the blue sky empty !


The shashi that once used to be is perhaps changed so much that it feels that he was a novel that I read ...engrossed in it !

Life has been supportive...in every field...from search of place, master to search of destiny....
I so wish to know what's the game behind all the scenes...I so wish to understand the mysteries...

To be alone ...in middle of crowd...is a strange feeling...

When I look at the stars at night....entire life ..everything in this world...simply appears to be absurd ...imagination..
One feeling ....remains...Gratefulness...Wonder....!

What a life ....I am so superly excited about my next half....!

guiding star has disappeared...but see there is always the sun at the door ! :-)

Love,

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