One constant tension and stress that I go through is the urge to be someone ! I always find myself running towards an undefined goal and in deep hurry.
Why is that we all want to be someone, want to make it big in life ?
Why does our society appreciate merit ? Why can't we just exist as we are ?
Why is that we want our kids to be great ?
These are just few more question that add to my confusion about life and I find myself broken and torned.
I always imagine a Shashi who is respected and looked upto. Without that, I feel I do not exist at all.
Just the other day, I made a stupid mistake the class. Something that only a big fool would make. I confused Public listed companies with Public sector organization. Sure No for an MBA / Entrepreneur.
It made me feel miserable. I felt that it was a thunder from the blue. Why ? I realized that I am just an image in eyes of my classmater. If they don't approve of me. I am nothing. May be that's why I want to see maximum approval by making it big in life.
We are just images in eyes of others. We exist not an individuals but as a collection. I wonder if that is the way to be.
Nevertheless, I just wonder if only this urge in me to be something , to make it really big in life, to get all the attention of the world - vanishes. MY LIFE AT THIS MOMENT would be so relaxing and enjoyable.
