Well ! that’s the name of the book I am reading right now by
the Japanese Zen Farmer Fukuoka. I’ve
moved to Dudhiya (Budhanwada) near Deori hoping to take the road back to Nature
both outside and my own inner nature. (assuming two are separate)
It’s been few weeks of trial run and I feel good about it.
It’s lovely to live next to a mountain in a small hut with very basic
facilities. Being in lap of nature is perhaps a very good first step to know
oneself and the world. I’ve planted some trees randomly. I do not have any
expertise on trees,plant and farming. I constantly think on my actions. Is it
right to bring external trees here ? Am I doing good in true sense ? Should I Plant
trees of same type together or mix them all ? What shall I do with the so
called weeds ? Shall I let them be or cut them ? So on and so forth. I am
learning more about natural, natueco farming and also directly learning from
nature through observations and experimentation.
It’s lovely. Slowly I
plan to get my life style in rhythm of nature and settle down more sorted.
Right now things are a bit scattered but I am moving towards natural order.
One thing I realize about this change of environment is that
it is definitely helpful. However, our mind remains the same. It starts
projecting itself in whatever environment you are. So unless there is a real
change of mind, change of environment can only be a show off for self and others.
My mind was earlier focused on money now I look out for getting more plants. I caught
myself with the same feeling but projected differently. Luckily and gratefully,
I was able to know it for myself and be aware of it.
People and situation there are quite hostile and tough
especially if compared to my Gaddige /Mysore situation. But I am deliberately
choosing the tougher, more frustrating and uphill path for I believe this will
be my test of “sadhana” and dealing with all these things will strengthen my
character and make me more realistic.
Sometimes I do wish for at least one or two of genuine
admirers for what I am doing. Somebody who can say, oh yes that looks like
going in right direction. But I won’t
let it be a deterrent factor. My belief
in my heart has become stronger and I will work on it. I trust nature, I want to
trust more. It’s heart breaking,
frustrating and depressing to know your own mom dad do not really approve of
what you do and actually think you’ve gone ashtray. It’s heart breaking to know
that few friends and family who might understand you are too busy with their
own struggles and life to give any word of encouragement or right advice. I
feel lonely at time in spirit. But I have started developing love for my
aloneness and find connections with trees, plants and birds. Man cannot be
blamed. I cannot expect all this from humans given what is state of our lives.
I must walk alone and enjoy every bit of it. Ekla chalo re ! J
